It's absolutely bonkers to me that I've been streaming on Twitch for a whole 5 years, now. Five years of one of the hardest jobs I've done, but also the most rewarding, and most revealing when it comes to my work ethic, how I deal with setbacks, and adapting on the fly. I can't picture myself doing anything else right now (except perhaps doing narrative work for video games...hint hint nudge nudge, game devs) and this job has definitely given me so, so much to be grateful for, as well as help me rack up accomplishments I never thought I could attain.
on top of my already existing depression. It’s not always easy to turn these steps into a routine, but with a lot of practice, I’ve been getting better at recognizing when my thoughts and feelings are stemming from depression, and these practices have definitely helped stabilize my mood on days where it’s in the dumps.
even born, and stuffing my face with candy corn (I know, I'm polarizing). October is always one of my favorite months of the year, where I get to fully embrace how much I love all things spooky, which I already do throughout the year, but October just makes it so much more special. To make it even more exciting, I'll be closing spooky season out with a fright-filled, spooktacular weekend full of raising money for charity!
After a nice, long-time-coming, well-deserved trip to Disneyland with a good friend, I feel the clutter in my mind put into neat little drawers, ready to tackle the big things I have coming up!
It feels good to get all of this out there. It feels good to truly manifest the growth I want to see in my life. I hope to see you cheering me on, as I continue to work for it.
Learning to care for myself as a content creator has been one of the longest, most arduous journeys I’ve ever faced, and to be completely honest, it will probably be a constant one. It’s one thing to worry about the variable income that comes from full-time, independent content creation, and it’s another to worry about the mental weight of not only that, but everything that comes from being in a space that gets inherently looked at as competitive. Sometimes it gets so overwhelming, that I can’t even begin to think about how to grasp that weight, and throw it out of my mind.
The first EVER Gayming Awards is happening this Wednesday at 12pm PST, and I'm super excited and honored to be co-streaming it onto my Twitch channel!
I wanted to write this not only as a moment of catharsis for myself, but also because I know several non-binary folx out there might feel the same way. No matter where we fall on the non-binary spectrum, I know several of my friends have felt pressure to present more masculine, or more feminine to feel desirable, and sometimes, more androgynously to be valid.
2020 was a mess. We can’t ignore that fact, but that doesn’t mean we can’t go into this new year with a sense of hope.
I wanted to do something special to thank those who support my Twitch channel or my Patreon page, and I've always loved the idea of sending holiday cards, so that's precisely what I'm doing!